The Moment My Life Changed

After Kyle’s doctor told us about her suspicions, we entered a world I never knew existed. I would speak often to a friend who could relate to my journey. Her son was diagnosed with Asperger’s. She was a constant source of support and resources (the diagnosis has since been removed). She, along with his doctor and speech therapist, told me about therapies offered through Regional Center. We met with our Regional Center coordinator and she granted us speech therapy, occupational therapy, Floortime, respite services and two days at a child development program. He had therapy 3 hours a day for 5 days.

I was nervous for the first session of our child development class at the Infant-Toddler program at CHIME. Thankfully, we were the only ones who attended that day. Kyle would not sit in the eating area. He barely made it through the singing/calendar time.

As time went on, I learned some techniques for helping Kyle. We learned sign language to stop the screaming. We started insisting he look at us before we granted his request. Through all this I still had the question, “Is Kyle autistic?” The therapists, teachers, and parents I met through our therapies had different opinions. Some said yes; he had all the classic signs. Others said he was too high functioning, and one person even said he was selectively mute not autistic.

I attended an autism conference February 2006. I spent most of the day crying and sitting in disbelief as two mothers shared their journeys. Their stories mimicked my story. I remember getting angry that I had to even deal with this issue. I felt so helpless that I couldn’t fix this. I didn’t want to deal with this. I wanted the whole autism issue to go away. I wanted someone to tell me he wasn’t autistic.

The last session was hosted by Lisa Ackerman, board member of Talk About Curing Autism (TACA). She was the one who shared the two best pieces of advice that have guided me. 1) The squeaky wheel gets attention but the squeaky wheel coated with honey will get results. Be pushy and firm but not nasty. 2) Feel guilty, feel angry, cry...then get over it. Your child needs you.

I contacted the UCLA Autism Evaluation Clinic. Since Kyle wasn’t a “typical” autistic child, we were afraid his Regional Center would disqualify him for services when he turned three. The cost for the evaluation was $3,500 but somehow we were able to get it at no cost. I am still not sure what I said to the secretary but the Training Clinic assessed him.

After three sessions, the doctor and psychologist had an answer for us. Kyle met the criteria for autism.